College Football Idiot Savant Week 9
Well I guess I should know better than to make a bet against the scarlet and gray, but 3-1 on the picks was a nice recovery. It’s nice to see teams like Notre Dame and Georgia barely cover to know there is more parity in the sport with NIL, and Toledo cover comfortably in bounce back fashion. The Buckeyes are resting this week but we have a bevy of ranked matchups to mull over. Remember, if you must bet more, put it on the team playing Michigan and forget parlays.
Prediction 1: Circle the wagons Sooners, this is an SEC game you joined the conference for. #8 Ole Miss travels to Norman to take on #14 Oklahoma (-5.5) in the new SEC. While the Sooners will enjoy the home field advantage, I see these teams as more evenly matched, and I really want another Lane Kiffin sound bite to remember from the post game presser. Take Ole Miss and the points.
Prediction 2: I recently asked #15 Missouri to, “Show Me” something as their state nickname implies, and they failed. This week they visit #10 Vanderbilt (-2.5) and I don’t have any more confidence that something great is going to come out of Missouri. Vanderbilt is the far better storyline this year, and with this basically being a pick-em game, I’m going with the academic school that’s giving up points. Vandy to cover.
Prediction 3: In our deep fried, big bucket, double bypass game of the week, the Aggies of #3 Texas A&M (-2.5) head down to Baton Rouge to take on #20 LSU. The thing you have to ask yourself with this matchup is this: Do I take a better team on the road to knock Brian Kelly out of the rankings for the price of less than a field goal? The answer is yes, allow the viewing of Kelly’s anguish to make your Saturday night more enjoyable. Texas A&M to cover.
In all that SEC talk, I didn’t forget about those in midnight blue who hail from fair Toledo. They go across the country to face a Washington State (-1.5) team that isn’t ready for Tucker Gleason. He threw four touchdowns and no interceptions last week in a rout, and it would be foolish to think he can’t engineer another victory. Here in Columbus Tommy’s remains the tailgate option of choice, stay classy and get your mind right for next week.
Summary:
Ole Miss and the points +5.5
Vanderbilt to cover -2.5
Texas A&M to cover -2.5
Toledo and the points +1.5
Record: 19-10-1
College Football Idiot Savant Week 8
It’s betting weeks like the last one that make you appreciate being a Buckeye fan. It’s betting weeks like the last one that I see them rolling in cover fashion to the tune of Whitesnake’s, “Here I Go Again.” They certainly walk on the lonely street of dreams, and although I went 1-2-1 last week, my resolve is not broken. There is still nothing good to report out of Missouri with that push, and it looks like I need more Indiana material. Tip of the cap to Eddie George’s Falcons and Pudge, we will see you next year at The Glass Bowl.
Prediction 1: It’s not out of nostalgia for the College Gameday show that I say it’s fallen. It’s because for some reason Disney is paying Pat McAfee and Desmond Howard to be the most unwatchable couple of blowhards I’ve ever seen on a sports broadcast. That said, they will be in Athens for #5 Ole Miss at #9 Georgia (-7.5) where I just have to go with the blue blood program and the NFL bodies on the Bulldogs roster. Georgia covers, but I would be interested to see what Lane Kiffin says afterward if they were to pull this off.
Prediction 2: Before you say I’ve gone Herbstreit, I didn’t throw for five touchdowns and eleven interceptions in my career at Ohio State. #1 Ohio State (-25.5) takes on the Badgers of Wisconsin at Camp Randall Stadium and twenty five and a half points is simply too much. Wisconsin will jump around at the end of the third, the Buckeyes will jump around at the end, and you can jump around the corner to the bank with Wisconsin and the points.
Prediction 3: I have a cynical theory. As much as I think the playoff committee tries to put together a good bracket, history tells us that Notre Dame (-9.5) will be the first three loss team to make the playoff. There has not been a more consistently overrated and undeserving team in my lifetime than the golden domers. That said, USC doesn’t play any defense, and Notre Dame should cover this week in the Colosseum.
I didn’t forget about you Rockets (-26.5), I’m looking forward to a bounce back blowout against Kent State at The Glass Bowl. Tucker Gleason is still on the roster, he went to his engineering classes this week, and he wants to party behind engineering Saturday night. Also, in my tradition of rooting with my heart against my bets, let me just say Trojans, “Fight On!”
Summary:
Georgia covers -7.5
Wisconsin and the points +25.5
Notre Dame to cover -9.5
Toledo covers -26.5
Record: 16-9-1
College Football Idiot Savant Week 6
Well Husky Stadium was no match for the Buckeyes, and they should have played Bachman Turner Overdrive’s, “Takin’ Care of Business” on QFM afterward. Penn State still can’t win a big one, and I’m beginning to think the whiteout is just to pump up t-shirt sales. Let’s get ready for another exciting week, and make some Ben Franklins (Always remember to gamble responsibly).
Prediction 1: The deep fried, big bucket game of the week sees #16 Vanderbilt travel to Tuscaloosa to bring an offering of grits and brain cells to a city bereft of one of those things. #10 Alabama (-10.5) looks to avenge one of the worst defeats in their history from last season against the Commodores. Frankly if they can’t cover against Vanderbilt, you don’t need to bet on them the rest of the season. It took Michigan 7 years to schedule Appalachian State after that debacle, but then they beat them 52-14. Alabama covers, hopes Neil Young will remember.
Prediction 2: If you asked Buckeye fans what they wanted most at the beginning of the season, it probably would have been to beat Michigan. Close on the list however would have been a big night game at the shoe. Instead, #1 Ohio State (-23.5) gets Minnesota at the 7:30 PM time slot, with a spread that’s not attractive to me. However, Minnesota struggled with Rutgers last weekend, Ohio State has Jeremiah Smith, as well as a host of offensive players that can allow you to cover on a lit up national broadcast.
Prediction 3: There is only one title contender playing in the state of Florida this week, and that is #3 Miami (-4.5) who is traveling to #18 Florida State. This matchup always makes me remember an animated Lee Corso on College Gameday shouting, “Wide right!” Of course a reference to the three heartbreaking wide right misses of Florida State kickers against Miami. The best part about this game for Florida State fans will be the pregame traditions, Miami covers.
This week sees the Rockets resting after an impressive cover against Akron I should have pulled the trigger on. With next weekend being The Battle of I-75 in third world Wood County, they should be prepared for the task at hand. I don’t want to be overly sensational, but if Vanderbilt wins, expect a themed week for the picks next time. The college football playoff doesn’t need Alabama around anyhow.
Summary:
Alabama covers -10.5
Ohio State covers -23.5
Miami covers -4.5
Record: 12-7
College Football Idiot Savant Week 5
It’s only been four weeks of college football, but I feel like we have all had some great entertainment so far. Liveforthepage locked in a 3-1 week against the spread last weekend, special thanks to Oklahoma’s defense for that late safety. The Rockets had a let down they can learn from and despite only four weeks passing, Dabo has fallen for the third time. In traditional mythology, it’s usually not until ninth station that the third fall takes place, so it’s been a banner year already.
Prediction 1: They say, “don’t bury the lead” so this week I won’t. The #6 Oregon Ducks fly into Happy Valley this week to take on #3 Penn State (-3.5) in the new age Big Ten. I recently drove through Erie, Pennsylvania and I have to say that it’s a bit misleading. I know it’s not October yet, but the eerie part of Pennsylvania is the white out game in State College. That being said, three and a half points is a low number for a home team in this kind of environment. The Ducks score and soar over the Nittany Lions, take the points.
Prediction 2: The second big matchup of the week comes to us from the deep, deep fried south, as #17 Alabama visits #5 Georgia (-3). SEC country is going to be out in force for this one, probably with pre-game trash talk involving the opposing fans’ sisters. We do that in the north too, but in the opposite direction, we aren’t shit talking about how hot our sisters are. As for the clash on the field, look for a slim cover by Georgia and a good watch with a lot of NFL bodies on both sidelines.
Prediction 3: With the students having completed the bye week bar crawl last weekend, they are ready for a fresh Ohio State (-8.5) team to take on Washington out west. It has been bet down to eight and a half from a nearly two touchdown line when it came out, and I see value here. I like the Buckeyes to open the Big Ten schedule in convincing fashion, make yourself a delicious Washington apple and enjoy the cover.
There is a great slate of 3:30 games to check out as conference play begins in the Big Ten, but nothing else that I want to put a nickel on. #11 Indiana (-8.5) and Iowa get together to compare corn, and that should be closer than the spread. #4 LSU plays the road dog role against #13 Ole Miss (-1.5) in the, ‘hope for a meteor’ game of the week, seriously could Brian Kelly be more unlikable? No Rockets (-21) bet this week either as they pick up the pieces against Akron, and that’s too big of a line. Tommy’s Pizza remains Columbus’ best bet for game day grub, 161 opens at eleven, Lane Ave at noon.
Summary
Oregon and the points +3.5
Georgia covers -3
Ohio State covers -8.5
Record 10-6
College Football Idiot Savant Playoff Week 2
Happy New Year Internet! It was an exciting first round of the new playoff format that saw liveforthepage improve to 24-19 for the year after a sweep of last week’s predictions. It’s time for more holiday college football and we’ve got some great picks that you can take to the bank. Of course if you don’t have money in the bank already, don’t bet on anything.
Prediction 1: New Years Eve kicks off with a pairing that I would have never predicted at the beginning of the season. I grew up watching Boise State’s rise to prominence, and who could forget the trick play game against Oklahoma? However, I just don’t think a Mountain West conference team deserves a bye, and the spread line of (-11) Penn State would indicate that. Happy valley will be happier by midnight, but only straight up, this one could be as Lee Corso used to say: “closer than the experts predict.”
Prediction 2: You can make a lot of hay betting against Texas to cover, but as we look to the new year I will try to embrace SEC arrogance and pick Texas (-12.5) to turn over a new leaf. It’s not out of a preponderance of evidence that I think Texas can run away with this wildly, but a reflection on how little I think of the Big 12. How Arizona State is a four seed will be looked at with questions about the playoff format, as the second team with a bye goes bye-bye. Texas covered in peaches instead of sour grapes.
Prediction 3: Old guard college football fans should see a lot of tradition in a matchup between Ohio State and Oregon at the Rose Bowl. After the first game earlier in the season at Oregon, many thought we might see this pairing again, and it’s suitable that the Rose Bowl is the venue for what could be the ‘real national title game.’ I trust that Will Howard has trained his knee to get down to the ground in a timely fashion since the first game, and the Buckeyes win straight up.
I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday, enjoy the games and eat as much bad food as you want. For the fourth playoff game, I don’t feel strongly about one side or the other, but Notre Dame is 0-3 all time against Georgia and I don’t think that record will improve for them. Notre Dame has been a playoff pretender since there has been a playoff. Enjoy the games and don’t forget about your family members, they need bad food too.
College Football Idiot Savant Playoff Week 1
Seasons greetings to all of the fine people who read and to the degenerate gamblers alike. Deck the halls it’s time for fa la la la football! Liveforthepage limped out of the pre-playoff season 1-2 to end up at 21-19 for the year so far. It’s seasons like this, with around a .500 record that I am thankful for all the food that is in my fridge because I only bet on a few of these. Oh look, there’s some college beer in the fridge, let’s make some bold assertions.
Prediction 1: Ohio State similarly limps into the postseason this year at home against Tennessee. Word on campus is that Tennessee fans have bought 30% of the tickets already, and that should irk Buckeye nation. Pro tip: If you are one of the numerous Buckeye fans from whom I’ve heard calls nonstop for SEC teams to play in the cold, and they put a shiner on Ohio State when it’s 25 degrees outside at the shoe, I don’t need to hear your opinion anymore. Ohio State wins, straight up.
Prediction 2: I may have jumped the gun on my stations of the cross bonus coverage a couple of weeks ago, but leave no doubt I will be picking Clemson to fall for the fourth time from here on out. My second prediction will be Dabo falls again until he does. Call me a loon, but I don’t ever want to see a good religious tradition like college football brought down by the likes of an ultra Christian program at a public university. Dabo falls a fourth time, breaking Jesus’ longstanding record.
Prediction 3: First 12 team playoff sees an Indiana Darby in the first round. The good news is, one of the Indiana teams will be out, we all need that. Indiana (+7.5) is the good bet here, but ultimately Notre Dame will win. Indiana is a great story, but they played one ranked opponent this season and they don’t have the acumen for the moment. Golden domes dispatch decorated in state Hoosiers straight up.
Join us weekly during the playoff for more college football expert analysis and absurdity. I am only biased toward one of the twelve teams involved, which the bean counters say gives me an 83% objective opinion. This would put me right in that 99th percentile of Buckeye fans, so you know I’m speaking rationally, the fact that I haven’t called for Ryan Day’s job yet alone puts me above the 90th. But seriously, get yer ya-yas out, we have been waiting for this playoff format for twenty years since the BCS and beyond, and it’s here.
College Football Idiot Savant Week 15
I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again, Ohio State needs to stop using that White Stripes song for kickoffs, Jack White is from Michigan and it couldn’t have helped. The Buckeyes didn’t quite get it done last weekend, and that drags the site down to 20-17, looking to stay above .500 with some championship week picks. We will be taking a break until the playoff, but rest assured the last shot hasn’t been fired yet from Columbus.
Prediction 1: All of the pitchforks and torches have gathered in Atlanta this weekend for a race rally…excuse me, for the SEC championship game. It has come to my attention that Mercedes Benz Stadium will not allow Texas’ mascot longhorn into the stadium for the game. This seems entirely reasonable, because it’s a giant animal and this is a neutral site game, only two kinds come from Texas, people with assault rifles and F-150s, and animals with large horns. Texas to win close straight up.
Prediction 2: The Big Ten championship seems like a shell of the game it was going to be before that Michigan mishap. Oregon at (-3.5) seems favorable for a cover to me, if for no other reason than because it took the, ‘we are Penn State’ people too long to take that Paterno statue down. Oregon is the better team, Penn State is just not the third best team team in the country, they are barely the third best available in the Big Ten. This week Oregon covers to make me feel like the way David Bowie covers do: excellent.
Prediction 3: In our cultural championship game, we see two ACC schools I immediately want to pan like a Dr. Oz infomercial. SMU and Clemson definitely qualifies for the, ‘rooting for the meteor’ designation. I can’t say anything positive about SMU, except that they have the opportunity to make Dabo fall for an unprecedented 4th time. That’s right, they pulled him down off the cross so they could knock him to the ground for one more bonus station. SMU (-2) wins straight up.
Liveforthepage will be off the college football beat until the playoff, but expect to hear something from us before then. It has been wonderful running through the gauntlet of the college football regular season with you, and I’m excited for the playoff. If I hear one more person call for Ryan Day’s job before the end of the season, I’ll go to Bob Dylan, “Let’s stop talkin’ falsely now, the hour’s getting late.”
College Football Idiot Savant Week 12
Well now that we’re all winners or (probably)losers after this election, let’s get down to picking some winners and losers. Emily did her part last week pulling off an impressive 2-1 contribution to make the season total 18-10. We have some interesting matchups for the week and I hope that you continue to make us your source for idiotic banter about other parts of the country. If you are betting real money based upon this shtick, call a gambling hotline.
Prediction 1: In our cultural matchup of the week we have #6 BYU and Kansas, I wonder what kind of tailgate this would be? I am imagining a game of corn hole with the least interesting conversation happening about local agricultural equipment sales and Joseph Smith’s legitimacy. This has now become the first ironic cultural matchup of the week because it will feature two places completely devoid of it. I assume it gets weird in Provo, otherwise this is upset alert, BYU survives.
Prediction 2: I’m taking a flyer on #22 LSU(-3.5) over Florida because I want to take time to recognize that if we had listened to James Carville a year ago we would be in a better place as a country. I’ll leave it at that, this college football thing was to escape right? Well now I just wanna escape this country, and do you know where I wouldn’t want to be right now? The Swamp. I said it earlier in the year, The Swamp at Florida doesn’t mean anything when you’re irrelevant. Carville wins straight up.
Prediction 3: In our prelude to the pitchforks matchup of the week, we see #7 Tennessee battle #12 Georgia. After a tough loss to Ole Miss last week Georgia looks to bounce back and keep their names in the playoff discussion. The wise guys have Georgia(-9.5) and I agree, this will be a bounce-back game for a group of elite athletes in Georgia. Since this isn’t a conversation about country music, and its contribution to the delinquency of society, who cares about Tennessee? Rocky Flop! Georgia easily.
In other events this week make sure to tune in to Big Ten Network for the buckeye game at Wrigley Field in Chicago against Northwestern, it should be a wonderful visual spectacle. It makes me really wonder why it’s buried on BTN, but then I thought for a second… Money. College football has always been about money whether you like it or not, it’s always been there. The ‘rah-rah’ school spirit has also always been there, BTN is a thing of the past. When the super conference network launches, I ponder the cost.
College Football Idiot Savant Week 9
We are now deep into the meat and potatoes of the college football schedule and after Texas didn’t have enough last week we stand at 12-7 for the year. So far the hype about the playoff has elevated this season for fans across the country and it is a crowded field competing for those 12 spots. Although the election is looming, we all win on Saturdays. Vote with your eyes on Saturday, vote with your mind on Election Day.
Prediction 1: In our cultural matchup of the week we see Ohio in-state rivals compete in, ‘The Battle of I-75.’ The rivalry between Toledo and Bowling Green currently stands at 43-41-4 with the rockets on top. Readers may wonder how a school with no culture or tradition such as Bowling Green would qualify to be in our cultural game of the week, and rightly so. We at liveforthepage take the opportunity from time to time to give attention to less fortunate institutions without indoor plumbing. Fair Toledo wins without sweating too much.
Prediction 2: Penn State comes in as (-6.5) the favorite against Big Ten foe Wisconsin this week in Madison. As the playoff picture becomes more crowded, Ohio State needs the boys in blue to stay undefeated to to make their matchup more meaningful, and I don’t see worry here. I will say it one step further, Penn State wins and covers. Although there will be jumping around in Madison on Saturday, it won’t be for an upset.
Prediction 3: Texas A&M and LSU square off in a top 15 matchup that could be the most competitive of the week. This is basically a toss up, with A&M favored by 1, and it should be entertaining. Overall I have been more impressed with the aggies this year, and when I flipped my Torrey Pines ball marker to decide this, it landed on them. That Torrey Pines marker has won me 3 coin tosses this year, so I’m all in. it will be a close game into the fourth quarter, Texas A&M for the win.
It should go without saying that the buckeyes will cruise to victory over Nebraska at home, already having thoughts of the weird people they will see in happy valley next week. Whether it’s a white out or not the buckeyes deserve to be favored, but of course as our old friend Will Money said in, ‘Unforgiven’ “deserve’s got nothin’ to do with it.’ They kick off at Big Noon, so you will still have the rest of your Saturday in Columbus to play golf, find a twilight special near you.
College Football Idiot Savant Week 8
Obviously that outcome in Autzen last week was not what Ohio State wanted, but there is a lot of season left, including Penn State in three weeks: back on the horse. Liveforthepage did fare well with the picks, I consider the buckeyes covering with a push prediction counting, they did not get to 500 yards of offense, but Zach absolutely called for Ryan Day’s job so we sit at 10-6. It’s an off week in Columbus, go play golf! On to Nebraska.
Prediction 1: In our cultural battle of the week, Indiana and Nebraska get together to trade husking techniques and corn based recipes as well as play a football game. The blimp cam will be interesting for this one, its going to look like 60,000 of the same person in the crowd, all cornfed white men in red. I like Indiana to win(-6.5), but this should be an old school football fan’s game, a brawl between the hashes. Bloomington will be a fun place to be Saturday night, if you have to be in Indiana I guess.
Prediction 2: In the coin flip game of the week brought to you by the Illinois Lottery, Michigan comes in as four point favorites and I see next to no justification for that. The Illini could play further spoilers into a U of M collapse post-Harbaugh. Luckily, since both states have sensible marijuana policy, the crowd will be enjoying themselves and I think on a ‘football weather’ kind of Saturday this screams upset. Liveforthepage supporters know I will make any excuse to pick orange, but this time it’s sensible.
Prediction 3: We have been spoiled for choice over the past few weeks with big matchups, and this week provides #1 Texas and #5 Georgia. In my lifetime, I have seen Texas choke so many times that this seems to look one way, but both teams are stacked with talent and this should be fun. Both of these teams are playoff contenders and I really don’t like Texas(-5) covering this. In for a penny, in for a pound, close win for the longhorns in the beautiful orange strip.
It’s October 18th and early voting has started! If you went to college, like college football, like the ideas discussed at college, then next week give early voting in Ohio the college try. Franklin county has a great facility on Morse Rd. and you will be in and out in no time. Regardless of what happens in the Big Ten or the SEC this week, the election is your civic duty. Enjoy the games this weekend, and if you’re in Columbus, Blacklick Woods Metropark Golf Course still has tee times to see those fall colors.
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