It’s a Wonderful Life of Albums: The Blue Album
If I hear the finger picked arpeggio opening of, “My Name is Jonas” there is a near definite chance that I will listen to the rest of The Blue Album. Weezer’s 1994 self-titled debut that came to be commonly known as The Blue Album is on just about any, ‘best of the decade’ lists. It got the name due in part to the minimalist design of the cover art, featuring the band standing next to each other with a blue background, and also because Weezer released another self-titled album just 7 years later (The Green Album) a trend that would continue throughout the band’s career.
“My Name is Jonas” sets the tone for the next forty minutes and change of nineties rock. The acoustic arpeggio at the beginning quickly gives way to the driving distorted guitars that compose the backbone of the record. The guitars on most of the songs are tuned down a half step on all the strings to give a darker feel to the power chords that accompany the heavy metal caricature lead parts that work so well. This is perhaps nowhere more apparent than the lead guitar fill before the last chorus of “Buddy Holly.”
While I will admit that the single, “Hash Pipe” was my introduction to Weezer, all roads lead to blue. “Undone (The Sweater Song)” became the first single from the album and the first of my person-to-person file sharing downloads that I fell in love with from the band. Its opening notes are the background for conversations between attendees to a show that preempt the first two verses. “If you want to destroy my sweater, hold this thread as I walk away” became an anthem of a chorus, and if anybody could give me a ride to the party after the show, I’ll cancel plans.
The catchy single, “Buddy Holly” makes you stop in your tracks a little bit, especially if you watch the music video that accompanied it. It features the band playing at Arnold’s Drive-In from the sitcom, “Happy Days.” Clips of the show are intercut and the real cast member Al Molinaro making a cameo. The whole time it conjures the question, “Is this guy in Buddy Holly glasses really doing a song called, “Buddy Holly?” Leader of the band Rivers Coumo has maintained the look throughout the band’s career, and he has pulled off the eccentric look for three decades.
River’s introverted and unconfident writing style wasn’t quite as exposed on the debut as it was on the follow up, Pinkerton, but it is definitely present. Stating his jealousy, “I want a girl who laughs for no one else,” isolation, “In the garage, I feel safe, no one cares about my ways,” parental disappointment, “This bottle of Steven’s awakens ancient feelings.” At no point does any of it feel dishonest, and that’s what landed it on the Rolling Stone top 500 albums of all time list at #294. In addition to being a critical and commercial success, it has made Rivers the king of geek-rock since 1994.
I was lucky enough to see them last year on the 30th anniversary tour at Nationwide Arena and they did not disappoint. There were wonderful brush strokes from their whole career that night, but ending with The Blue Album in its entirety was masterpiece theater. The cool part is that I know there are generations of Weezer fans that came after me, so somewhere today there is a teenager re-enacting the line, “This band’s my favorite man, don’t you love them?”
It’s a Wonderful Life of Albums: Bleed American
Welcome to liveforthepage’s new series on some of the classic albums I’ve loved during my decades of putting the iPod click wheel to the first song on an album and listening until conclusion. I generally think this is the way any band’s work should be considered: the album as a whole. There is no doubt something great about a band that just gets it perfect once, it’s hard not to love a ‘one hit wonder.’ I think more discerning listeners would agree that for a band to be truly great, they have to have THAT record.
When you press play on Jimmy Eat World’s 2001 breakthrough album of my youth, Bleed American it doesn’t even give you a chance to think before it hits you with a driving guitar riff and a great opening line, “I’m not alone, ’cause the TV’s on, yeah.” It settles into an energetic alt-rock standard of distorted guitars and passionate vocals which Jim Adkins had been known for on the indie circuit, becoming the band’s lead singer on the previous album “Clarity.”
It’s very difficult for me not to do a song by song breakdown of this album, but I want this to be accessible, so let’s say I don’t skip on this album. “A Praise Chorus” comes next and, “I wanna fall in love tonight” is a lyric I can almost always get behind. Later in the song it blends a bridge of “crimson and clover, over and over” an homage to the Tommy James and the Shondells hit from 1968. The reason you probably recognize the album cover, or Jimmy Eat World in general is from the third track, “The Middle.”
“It just takes some time, little girl you’re in the middle of the ride, everything, everything’ll be just fine.” Can’t hate the sentiment. As one of the most recognizable rock songs of the 2000s, it is their claim to fame. I have heard it so many times, including 7 times live–it’s just a good pop song. If it is the case that all musical elements must come together in such a way that facilitates airplay and record executives’ jets to make the most money, at least it sounded like this. That guitar solo never gets old, and that catchy chorus helped it sell over 1.5 million copies in the Napster landscape.
“Sweetness” is so energetic live and always the sweatiest one if memory serves me. “Hear You Me” is the perfect ‘palette cleanser’ song in the middle that starts out acoustic and builds to beauty. “The Authority Song” hit me immediately and I never looked back. How has that guitar riff not been featured in every coming of age teen movie of all time? “I don’t seem obvious do I?” There are just too many good songs on this album. I hope this serves as nostalgia of the noughties for the people I grew up with. I bet you made out to this album.
Isn’t that John Candy?
Maybe I take a little too much joy in it because is was at the expense of the Cincinnati Bengals, maybe it was because I grew up playing Tecmo Bowl on NES with Montana to Rice becoming my religion. However, there is no maybe in the huddle on the final drive of Super Bowl XXIII, where Joe Montana casually says to his men, “Isn’t that John Candy?” They laugh, and then complete a game winning drive with a touchdown, one of four for Montana and the Niners in the eighties.
It is truly a game of inches when you think about the end of the XXXIV Super Bowl and the great game that it was. The greatest show on turf St. Louis Rams were on the sideline for the defining play, as Kevin Dyson came up one yard short of the end zone. You wanted to see this win for Kurt Warner, but I don’t think anyone wished that kind of Bill Buckner-esque bad ending on Dyson.
My dad will hate me for this, but one of my favorite plays in Super Bowl history is the Elway dive. Super Bowl XXXII on a 3rd and 6 Elway gets 8 as he throws his body, and his whole career really, at the 3 defenders. When he left the ground he was a hero, when he came down with the first down he became a Super Bowl winner. Terrell Davis deserves a shout out for this Super Bowl as well, he was a workhorse.
For you idiots thinking something is fixed, let me take you back to the face of the league Peyton Manning getting out coached and outplayed by New Orleans, who successfully recovered the second half opening onside kick of the century. I am a Manning apologist, but Drew Brees winning this one for New Orleans was the way it was supposed to be.
So when you are on your Super Bowl journey tonight, get the best food, this is the cheat day of all cheat days. Enjoy your friends if you go to a party and resist the narrative that the game is fixed in any way. Regardless of the number of times they put Taylor Swift on TV, it has no impact on the ten 300lb offensive and defensive lineman that decide the game in the trenches, it has no impact on Mahomes being the best quarterback in the game. I’m gonna try to enjoy Kendrick Lamar at halftime, I know he’s a legend, and you should all treat yourselves too, Chiefs cover (-1.5).
College Football Idiot Savant Season Review
Hello friends, we hope you have gotten some enjoyment out of the weekly picks, and some laughs from the terrible jokes. We ended up 2-1 for the national title game, because Notre Dame let us down and allowed the Buckeyes over 400 yards of offense, I shed a tear. We finish 30-22 for the year, but nobody cares today, we got the last one right. Class was missed this morning in Columbus, Emily’s co-worker already had a national championship t-shirt on, and the rest of the college football world is going to love to hate us again.
I’ve never been happier to win $3 in my life, three separate $1 bets on Ohio State to cover (-9.5 and -8.5) respectively. That game should, in the end, leave no doubt in a rational persons’ mind that The Ohio State Buckeyes are the best team in the nation this season. It has been enjoyable to write for those who read and I will consider doing it next season, while flawed, the playoff delivered and that was the reason I started this weekly piece. This has been a fantastic Buckeye team to watch this season, and they deserve all the praise for living up to the expectations here, national champions.
How’s it feel to be in Ann Arbor now?
South Bend?
All of the South?
I leave the Notre Dame fans with a reading from the book of Lebowski: “I guess that’s the way the whole durned human comedy keeps perpetuatin’ itself down through the generations. Westward the wagons, across the sands of time until we – ah, look at me. I’m ramblin’ again.” See you in August again Texas, O-H!
College Football Idiot Savant National Championship
(In an effort to remain as objective as possible with the picks this week, I have chosen to write from the Notre Dame perspective. This should prevent me from conscious or unconscious bias. I respect my right to do this on behalf of a roommate I had in college who did a stint at Notre Dame. I am not going to pretend our catholic upbringing doesn’t come into this as well, it does.)
It’s been such a blessed season friends! Liveforthepage is at 28-21 for the season’s predictions and we now stare down one final athletic competition between wonderful college athletes fighting for school pride. There will be a national championship to decide the best college football team in the nation for this season, and in a new playoff format, kinda like coming home to fresh apple pie from your loving wife.
Prediction 1: There are total gentleman on both sides of this intercollegiate competition, but I think the ones wearing the golden helmets of the lord just have something here. They will hold the secular and superior Ohio State offense to under 400 total yards during the game. Notre Dame is going to need a Tebow-like performance out of Riley Leonard on the other side of the ball, luckily he puts God first at all times and will be efficient on 3rd down.
Prediction 2: Let’s be honest, we are all here to spread Jesus’ message to the world, and what better way to do that than to have our team in a championship! I am willing to bet any amount of money in the world, which means nothing because Jesus is my savior and I would live in a box on Skid Row with him. Even so, our faithful brothers at Notre Dame would never join a conference. Do you know how much NBC money would be taken out of the coffers at church if Notre Dame joined a conference and became legitimate?! (Both Notre Dame and Ohio State players will wear bible verses on their eye-black.)
Prediction 3: I will tell you what brothers and sisters, this is a tall task. But I am again conflicted, there seems to be illicit commerce taking place in the house of the lord. Jesus would turn over the tables of these gamblers trying to say that Notre Dame is eight and a half points less likely to win than the Ohio State! Clearly we need to put the entire collection basket on Ohio State covering (-8.5).
This next game will truly be a test of faith—light a candle, unless you’re in Los Angeles, then definitely pray. Love the sinner, hate the sin, Ohio State has just been too good this year, probably savoring all of the seven deadly sins. They will get their gratification here on earth on Martin Luther King Jr. Day in Atlanta, but Notre Dame will have their victory in paradise.
College Football Idiot Savant Playoff Semifinal.
With the clutter is mostly eliminated from the playoff we see the cream rise to the top with the final four teams. Liveforthepage comes off a 2-1 quarterfinal stage to bring us to 26-20 for the year, and we aim to continue the winning record in the final two weeks. As always, liveforthepage is not responsible for gambling losses associated with these predictions, please be a degenerate responsibly.
Prediction 1: However, I just got a tip last week from real wiseguy who has Notre Dame in the final. I haven’t really been impressed with Penn State (+1.5) and there isn’t really an incentive to take the points here. They may not be playing in the shadow of touchdown Jesus, but I think this is where Penn State’s story ends. While the thought of an all Big Ten final is appealing, the Buckeyes beating the golden domers in the final is too damn good. Notre Dame covers.
Prediction 2: Don’t mess with Texas…Seriously don’t mess with Texas if you want them to cover a game for you. Don’t mess with Texas…Unless you’re an Arizona State running back. Don’t mess with Texas…Well, let’s just say they have an inflated opinion of themselves even though they haven’t done anything since Vince Young played quarterback there. I’m not going to predict a thrashing as compete as what happened against Oregon, but this game is ripe for a cover at Ohio State (-6).
Prediction 3: I don’t live in their skin, but I have to imagine this Ohio State team is pretty fresh after barely having to do anything in the second half against Oregon. They should be rested and they are the best team left, which is why I am going with offensive yards, over 400. This Texas secondary just let a running back throw a touchdown on them last week, our #1 wide receiver room in the nation should split them up like a filet knife.
Jesus Quintana once said, “I see you rolled your way into the semis. Dios Mio, man. Liam and me, we’re gonna fuck you up.” Like that character from The Big Lebowski, Jesus will be present in the semis with Notre Dame, but that will be their last great line in this movie. The Dude and Walter are Ohio State in this scenario, and you can bet they will be abiding on January 20th.
College Football Idiot Savant Playoff Week 2
Happy New Year Internet! It was an exciting first round of the new playoff format that saw liveforthepage improve to 24-19 for the year after a sweep of last week’s predictions. It’s time for more holiday college football and we’ve got some great picks that you can take to the bank. Of course if you don’t have money in the bank already, don’t bet on anything.
Prediction 1: New Years Eve kicks off with a pairing that I would have never predicted at the beginning of the season. I grew up watching Boise State’s rise to prominence, and who could forget the trick play game against Oklahoma? However, I just don’t think a Mountain West conference team deserves a bye, and the spread line of (-11) Penn State would indicate that. Happy valley will be happier by midnight, but only straight up, this one could be as Lee Corso used to say: “closer than the experts predict.”
Prediction 2: You can make a lot of hay betting against Texas to cover, but as we look to the new year I will try to embrace SEC arrogance and pick Texas (-12.5) to turn over a new leaf. It’s not out of a preponderance of evidence that I think Texas can run away with this wildly, but a reflection on how little I think of the Big 12. How Arizona State is a four seed will be looked at with questions about the playoff format, as the second team with a bye goes bye-bye. Texas covered in peaches instead of sour grapes.
Prediction 3: Old guard college football fans should see a lot of tradition in a matchup between Ohio State and Oregon at the Rose Bowl. After the first game earlier in the season at Oregon, many thought we might see this pairing again, and it’s suitable that the Rose Bowl is the venue for what could be the ‘real national title game.’ I trust that Will Howard has trained his knee to get down to the ground in a timely fashion since the first game, and the Buckeyes win straight up.
I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday, enjoy the games and eat as much bad food as you want. For the fourth playoff game, I don’t feel strongly about one side or the other, but Notre Dame is 0-3 all time against Georgia and I don’t think that record will improve for them. Notre Dame has been a playoff pretender since there has been a playoff. Enjoy the games and don’t forget about your family members, they need bad food too.
College Football Idiot Savant Playoff Week 1
Seasons greetings to all of the fine people who read and to the degenerate gamblers alike. Deck the halls it’s time for fa la la la football! Liveforthepage limped out of the pre-playoff season 1-2 to end up at 21-19 for the year so far. It’s seasons like this, with around a .500 record that I am thankful for all the food that is in my fridge because I only bet on a few of these. Oh look, there’s some college beer in the fridge, let’s make some bold assertions.
Prediction 1: Ohio State similarly limps into the postseason this year at home against Tennessee. Word on campus is that Tennessee fans have bought 30% of the tickets already, and that should irk Buckeye nation. Pro tip: If you are one of the numerous Buckeye fans from whom I’ve heard calls nonstop for SEC teams to play in the cold, and they put a shiner on Ohio State when it’s 25 degrees outside at the shoe, I don’t need to hear your opinion anymore. Ohio State wins, straight up.
Prediction 2: I may have jumped the gun on my stations of the cross bonus coverage a couple of weeks ago, but leave no doubt I will be picking Clemson to fall for the fourth time from here on out. My second prediction will be Dabo falls again until he does. Call me a loon, but I don’t ever want to see a good religious tradition like college football brought down by the likes of an ultra Christian program at a public university. Dabo falls a fourth time, breaking Jesus’ longstanding record.
Prediction 3: First 12 team playoff sees an Indiana Darby in the first round. The good news is, one of the Indiana teams will be out, we all need that. Indiana (+7.5) is the good bet here, but ultimately Notre Dame will win. Indiana is a great story, but they played one ranked opponent this season and they don’t have the acumen for the moment. Golden domes dispatch decorated in state Hoosiers straight up.
Join us weekly during the playoff for more college football expert analysis and absurdity. I am only biased toward one of the twelve teams involved, which the bean counters say gives me an 83% objective opinion. This would put me right in that 99th percentile of Buckeye fans, so you know I’m speaking rationally, the fact that I haven’t called for Ryan Day’s job yet alone puts me above the 90th. But seriously, get yer ya-yas out, we have been waiting for this playoff format for twenty years since the BCS and beyond, and it’s here.
Why You Need Jimmy Stewart This Christmas
If you’re a compassionate person who cares about humanity, you might be in a panic right now like I am. All I can do is point you in the right direction for distraction from the dizzying reality we are about to face. While you’re contemplating the relatives and which ones you can or can’t talk with, remember that the holidays are a time for the people you love. If they don’t reciprocate, it is not your responsibility to fix them.
There will be debate if I say, ‘Best Christmas Movie.’ I am trying to avoid that. I only want you to consider the movie of my family this holiday season. The 1946 classic, ‘It’s a Wonderful Life’ was an illustration of the values that were instilled in me as a person from my too lucky birth to two school teachers.
The story starts out with the images of Christianity, but not with specificity. ‘God’ making a bargain with an angel short of status. I’ll play along because of how good the journey is, but this movie doesn’t really have a lot of religion in it thankfully if you just accept the angel being part of the plot. I like George Bailey, and if you don’t, you may as well stop reading, you don’t care about your neighbors.
I, like George Bailey wanted to travel to great places, not the reflexive instinct to, ‘give up’ and settle in a small town. This of course falls apart when he meets the love of his life and dances like he has no enemies. “Why don’t you kiss her instead of talking her to death!” This results in the most penthouse letters parody Hollywood could get away with in the forties. George of course does the right thing in the end.
This is where the movie takes a sharp turn, the narrative conflicts really begin, and George meets that fated angel to go through arguably the most recognizable plot device ever of showing George what Bedford Falls would look like if he had never been born.
For me, at multiple points in the movie, it’s a Mike Tyson punch to the tear ducts. I cry at a lot of good movies, doing my part to live out the Jim Valvano ESPYs speech as often as I can. You laugh, you think, you cry, that’s a full day. Have a full day this holiday season everyone.
College Football Idiot Savant Week 15
I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again, Ohio State needs to stop using that White Stripes song for kickoffs, Jack White is from Michigan and it couldn’t have helped. The Buckeyes didn’t quite get it done last weekend, and that drags the site down to 20-17, looking to stay above .500 with some championship week picks. We will be taking a break until the playoff, but rest assured the last shot hasn’t been fired yet from Columbus.
Prediction 1: All of the pitchforks and torches have gathered in Atlanta this weekend for a race rally…excuse me, for the SEC championship game. It has come to my attention that Mercedes Benz Stadium will not allow Texas’ mascot longhorn into the stadium for the game. This seems entirely reasonable, because it’s a giant animal and this is a neutral site game, only two kinds come from Texas, people with assault rifles and F-150s, and animals with large horns. Texas to win close straight up.
Prediction 2: The Big Ten championship seems like a shell of the game it was going to be before that Michigan mishap. Oregon at (-3.5) seems favorable for a cover to me, if for no other reason than because it took the, ‘we are Penn State’ people too long to take that Paterno statue down. Oregon is the better team, Penn State is just not the third best team team in the country, they are barely the third best available in the Big Ten. This week Oregon covers to make me feel like the way David Bowie covers do: excellent.
Prediction 3: In our cultural championship game, we see two ACC schools I immediately want to pan like a Dr. Oz infomercial. SMU and Clemson definitely qualifies for the, ‘rooting for the meteor’ designation. I can’t say anything positive about SMU, except that they have the opportunity to make Dabo fall for an unprecedented 4th time. That’s right, they pulled him down off the cross so they could knock him to the ground for one more bonus station. SMU (-2) wins straight up.
Liveforthepage will be off the college football beat until the playoff, but expect to hear something from us before then. It has been wonderful running through the gauntlet of the college football regular season with you, and I’m excited for the playoff. If I hear one more person call for Ryan Day’s job before the end of the season, I’ll go to Bob Dylan, “Let’s stop talkin’ falsely now, the hour’s getting late.”
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