‘If music be the food of love, play on.’ That’s the Shakespeare quote I would have used for the original iPod campaign that sold me, and it may have worked on a billboard. They used the iconic song, ‘Are You Gonna Be My Girl’ from the album ‘Get Born’ by the Australian band Jet. I think they made the right choice, because my love of music drove me to spend way too much money on that original iPod generation 3. My thought was, ‘you can put how many songs on there?’ And also, it was the Marilyn Monroe of mp3 players, the clicker wheel, the music game they put on there where you got points based on how quickly you could recognize songs from your library, ‘Some Like it Hot.’

I built PCs with my friends in high school like it was a second job, so any thought of an Apple product back then for any of us was the equivalent of sacrilege. Since we were in Catholic school at the time, that was two counts of sacrilege against me in the same institutional group. When we were all deciding to get our laptops for college, I was incredibly lucky, because Apple had just decided to put Intel processors in their new MacBook. That meant, I could put windows on it too, and hedge my bets. Bet your life I got the most out of that first MacBook and all the creativity possibilities it provided.

After College, after probably some irresponsible ONU student left an iPod Mini at one of the parties, nobody else wanted it so I claimed it. I put a playlist on there from my iTunes and gave it to my young cousin, son of my coolest uncle. Thinking about it now he was so young that when he wrote me a thank you note, it was on three line paper. He said he really liked, ‘More Than a Feeling.’ Recently I found he still has that collection of songs, and without that first inclination to get an iPod, how would that be possible?

There are a lot of conversations about Steve Jobs to be had, I don’t want to get into the weeds about it though, because he was the visionary who made these products happen. Personally, as a nerd, I would give Wozniak far more credit. I say that, like I would give the left tackle credit for making that quarterback’s pass possible. They are in the same band, and The Rolling Stones don’t exist without both Mick Jagger and Keith Richards.

Then came the iPhone, I remember when my cousin had the first one on AT&T because that ancient behemoth somehow secured exclusivity. I got the iPhone 4 as soon as I could when that barbaric arrangement was over. First smartphone, only smartphone. I don’t want to use a marketing slogan because I know the tech, but, ‘It Just Works.’ That’s why I got my parents on the platform, with an iMac almost ten years ago, and the number of tech support calls dropped off considerably.

I achieved what Steve Jobs was dreaming about though, my 110 GB music library in my pocket on my iPhone. Playing guitar into my Mac Mini and recording songs into the abyss. Listening to music based on the shape of my ear with my AirPods Pro like I’ve never heard it before. Typing this sentence on my latest MacBook, something I couldn’t live without since 2006. So when you say Apple is too expensive, or inferior, I don’t need a Jet song to tell you, ‘Think Different.’

‘They haven’t made anything good since Dookie.’ If I had a dime for every time I heard this ignorant trope of the musically stunted I would buy even more Manchester United attire. Not only is this statement untrue, it is laughable in its simplistic absurdity. The Dookie album was no doubt one of the highlights of the 90s with unforgettable classics like, ‘Basket Case’ ‘When I Come Around’ and ‘Welcome to Paradise’ among others. However, one album does not a great band make.

If you need any further testament to the fact that Green Day is in fact a great band, please allow me to evangelize. In 2004, mathematically ten years after Dookie and disproving idiotic claims, ‘American Idiot’ was released to be one of the first seminal albums to Millennials. I was in high school at the time, and this thing was everywhere, uniting all manner of youth across clique lines and something that was palpable socially in a way that only music can be.

For context, it was released in September leading up to the 2004 Bush/Kerry election, and in addition to being a generation defining album it was also one of our first protest statements. The title track screams: ‘Don’t wanna be an American idiot, don’t want a nation under the new media!’ This couldn’t have been more pertinent at the time when Fox News was exploding with Bill O’Riley leading the nauseating march to bring America back to the 1950s Levittown he grew up in. Ah, Levittown, a Long Island residential community with a clause allowing occupancy only to members of the caucasian race.

The title track was amazing, but where this album got its teeth was when ‘Holiday’ became our generation’s ‘Fortunate Son.’ ‘Oh I beg to dream and differ from the hollow lies, this is the dawning of the rest of our lives, on holiday!’ With Iraq and Afghanistan flooding every television moment this song spoke to the collective rage against Bush’s flag waving, stay the course, post 9/11 hysteria. I hope George can live with himself, it’s nice that he’s painting now, just like Hitler did.

‘Boulevard of Broken Dreams’ was another classic that didn’t seem to get old despite radio overplay. I attribute its success to the fact that it is the same chord progression as Oasis’ ‘Wonderwall.’ This was something that Noel Gallagher pointed out jokingly in an interview at the time, but was spot on. The next time you hear someone disparage Green Day for whatever reason, please make a point to tell them ‘Good Riddance.’

I’m not just saying this because I’m dating someone in Chicago, I’m not just saying this because it’s a mind numbingly visual famine of a drive: Indiana sucks. It is as if all intellectual progress stops at the border and doesn’t continue until you pass into one of the bordering states, and keep in mind, one of those is fucking Kentucky.

My route is what I would refer to as connecting the ear-rings of the Midwest, Columbus to Chicago. On the way I was reminded very boldly on a large sign in a farm field that, ‘Jesus is Real.’ Another billboard had a big crossed out circle over the traditional image of the evolutionary progression of species. When I say there were five more evangelical atrocities on my interstate journey, they didn’t get smarter than those.

Let me bite my tongue for a moment, because I have passed by the Purdue University exit 4 times now and stopped once. I have a lot of respect for this institution as I do for Indiana University, but this was my stop: The Wendy’s freestyle machine that has worked everywhere else I’ve ever been, was almost nonfunctional, and the employees said that it was because of the internet speed, in 2022.

When you enter the state you are greeted with: Indiana, ‘The Crossroads of America.’ Except this isn’t the crossroads where you sell your soul to the devil for amazing guitar skills, it’s the crossroads where you get bombarded with bigotry end to end. As soon as you cross the border it is evident that the roads are paved with some sort of inferior asphalt that makes the road noise unbearable. Crank the volume for those Indiana boys on them shitty Indiana nights.

What more can I expect from the state that gave us Mike Pence? What more can I expect from a state where at one point 30% of the male population were members of the Ku Klux Klan? I’m half surprised I didn’t have to present my birth certificate and bible at the border, but I digress. Though I drive through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no hoosier, for you are with me; thy Diet Coke and thy Apple Music comfort me. -Psalm 23:4

As a two time Obama voter and graduate of the Great Recession, I want to give a little perspective on the dream and the reality. America needs a change we can believe in, again. I am grateful for the political band-aid that Joe Biden has put on a fascist-insurrectionist wound, but we need to move toward a more perfect union together.

I don’t agree with all of Bernie Sanders’ ideals, but the only way we can move forward toward a better, more equitable society, is to support more collectivist policies for all Americans. This is coming naturally from more workers trying to unionize, which they absolutely should, but also needs to come from the rest of us millennials who are finally starting to vote.

I think in this new era, we need to demand at minimum a public option on health care, and a system of federally funded community colleges and trade schools for any who wish to attend. No more lip service to the people who scratch and claw for economic security.

It might also be a good idea to turn the green new deal dream into an economical housing new deal. Something for red and blue states and to end homelessness, and promote home ownership. I don’t need to tell you this is unrealistic, it is. Although, when you consider the absurdities of the right and what has happened with the supreme court, let me be clear…it’s up to us.

It’s my favorite Jimmy Eat World song and the year we are now embarking on as a species, and we have a lot on our plate. There is a line in the song that brings me back to my secular-humanist core, “I won’t always love what I’ll never have,
I won’t always live in my regrets.” I’ll never accumulate massive wealth with what I do, and I believe the lottery is something of a minor crime put upon the desperate. So for the first part, I’ll never love the money I’ll never have, only appreciate the wonderful things that I do without dwelling on regrets.

I don’t make resolutions, because I think it is disengenuous to pick a day of the year to do so, and not try to improve oneself on a daily basis. “Be the change you want to see in the world.” I won’t attribute it to anyone because it appears to be disputed, but what a beautiful sentiment. 2023 has a chance to be the best year of mine in a long time, despite the Buckeyes losing in heartbreaking fashion last night, I met my best friend’s new girlfriend and we had a great time. I have a good feeling about it, and I have recently started a relationship myself, so I have hope.

23 is going to see the Republicans taking over the house and Marjorie Taylor Greene getting a lot more publicity for most likely investigating Hunter Biden’s laptop to no avail. There is progress to be made still, and I will hold back my vitriol for a post that isn’t on the first of the year. That ‘best friend’s new girlfriend’ is a liberal, so this is going to get interesting, and I can’t wait for it. The thought of owning the right wing isn’t an ideal I live for, but it will be great to have another voice of reason in his life.

Manchester United may have new ownership, the best news for the club since Marcus Rashford emerged as their number 10. The Cleveland Browns won’t make the playoffs this year, but there is reason to believe that success is possible next season beyond the normal irrational, ‘Super Bowl Year X’ hysteria normally found within the fanbase in the offseason. The Columbus Crew have a new coach and a great roster to send FC Cincinnati back to Appalachian hell in style this year and as ever, glory to Columbus!

I have always found this to be the most contradictory lyric in Jimmy Eat World’s catalog: “It’s just not me to wear it on my sleeve, count on that for sure.” Lead singer Jim Adkins wears every emotion on his sleeve, and with every one of the nearing double digit live shows I’ve attended, that is the way to be. I am going to wear 2023 on my sleeve, and make the absolute most of it, down to the marrow. One of the more prompting lyrics of the song is what I will leave you with, “You’ll sit alone forever
If you wait for the right time.” The right time is now.