That bumper sticker, and the dozens of memes and references I’ve seen since have never ceased to make me crack a wide, devious, and undeniably smug smile. Sometime this year, when I saw the sticker actually on the back of another Prius, I realized the world had come full circle and my grin was ear to ear. Please allow me take you through my last five commutes to work:
My Commute according to Google Maps is 24.3 miles, a combination of highway and city streets, and I averaged 52.88 miles per gallon over 5 trips. I was a History major, but I thought it would be important to include some of my mathematical insights as I did finish at the top of my only math class; MATH 1180 Math For Liberal Arts (Yes, it was actually called that).
This particular tank was filled at $4.99 a gallon, and for the purposes of not straining my little snowflake brain, I’m going to call it $5.00. So this is a sizable commute, from Northwest Columbus to the East side, and with these numbers, I was paying less than $5.00 a day there and back. Can somebody, anybody, give me a, “Let’s Go Brandon?!”
In 2015, the year I bought my 2012 Prius C, the average fuel economy for new cars in the United States soared to 24.8 miles per gallon. (Citation Below) I did pay more to buy a hybrid back then than I would have paid for an average car, but let’s put that into a little 2022 perspective. I paid $12,500 for my Prius in 2015, and have been averaging around 50 miles per gallon or more combined since then.
United States Average Gas Prices By Year 2015-Present:
2015: $2.45, 2016: $2.14, 2017: $2.42, 2018: $2.72, 2019: $2.60, 2020: $2.17 2021: $3.01 2022: $4.90
Cost of My Current Commute By Year, Average 2015 Vehicle Vs. 2012 Prius C
4 in office days a week, 8 trips a week, 24.3 miles, 50 weeks a year. (8×24.3×50=9,720)
Average Car 2015, 25 MPG = 388.8 Gallons/Year:
2015: $952.56 2016: $832.03 2017: $940.89 2018: $1,057.53 2019: $1,010.88 2020: $843.69 2021: $1,170.29 2022: $1,905.12
7 Year Total: $8,712.90
Prius C 2012, 50 MPG = 194.4 Gallons/Year:
2015: $476.28 2016: $416.02 2017: $470.45 2018: $528.77 2019: $505.44 2020: $421.85 2021: $585.15 2022: $952.56
7 Year Total: $4,356.52
My decision was based on both my environmentalist beliefs and personal economics, two things that are only mutually exclusive if you are a moron, or have consistent proximity to truck nuts. In short, you can irrationally blame gas prices on Biden, but you should have gotten smart long before a 2020 decision was in your care.
Toyota has been selling the Prius in the United States since 2000, and many other auto makers have followed in the hybrid market since then. What I’m trying to say is that if you haven’t made a smarter decision on your vehicle by now, I have no sympathy for you. You don’t have to buy a Tesla to make a difference, willful ignorance however is inexcusable.
I’ll leave you with another quote to ponder, and know that it’s never too late to go green, but you might have to remove the fake testicles from your vehicle first. “God has a special providence for fools, drunkards, and the United States of America.” – Otto Von Bismarck
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