I got a new watch for X-mas and I love it, reminds me of a Mercedes, color wise, and I’ll never own one of those. Not that I don’t have confidence in German engineering, because I do, but if I have money someday, I’m goin’ to Japan for a luxury car. Honda/Acura had me sold long ago, and they haven’t done anything to dissuade me (lookin’ at you Toyota).

But as for the tick, I cannot sleep with even the most minute noise coming from anywhere. I have ears that are way to sensitive is my diagnosis, but that’s another story. Literally this watch sits on my desk, and if I don’t fall asleep before I hear it, I hear it….until I get outta bed and cover it with a bunch of clothing.

This sounds like what an insane person would do. I am totally not cursing my sensitive ears, wouldn’t be able to love Radiohead without them. But at the same time it’s like what the fuck? Why is there not a silent watch in 2011? What benefit is there of a watch that still makes a noise?

So it brings me to an important point, how far have we really come? (This is very melo-dra, considering one man has lost nights of sleep to clocks and watches).

I feel we’ve been on a bit of a progress roller coaster over the course of human history, none of it has had concern for people who cannot sleep from watches.

The Super Ancient Age: Farming, tribes, cities, language, pottery, written word.
The Ancient Age: Greek Philosophy, Homer’s Odyssey, The Iliad, Alexander.
Rome: Vestil Virgins (lol) Empire, Architecture copyright violations, Caesar, Aqueducts, Roads, Connections with the East, Legionaries, Gladiators, Trade Networks.
Middle Ages: Catholic Church fucks Rome, ppl throw shit from windows=sanitation.
Renaissance: Cool to be gay again, Great art, Great writing, Great music. The Dutch Ruled.
Industrial Rev: Cool to be rich, Sucked to be poor. Cheaper products. Changed the World.
Post WW2: Sucked to be anyone other than USA or USSR.
Modern Age: Say hello to ASIA!

That was incredibly generalized, but not too far from correct, in a joking manner. Alas, no big demand for silent watches. The Swiss can launder money, conceal huge amounts of stolen merchandise under international disclosure laws, even make good pocket knives. But, have no interest in making silent watches.

In conclusion this was a self-indulgent pseudo-crap, that I decided to take on the internet. I hope my grammatical correctness makes up for my complete lack of couth. And also, Fuck you to the spell check program that wordpress.com has chosen, because COUTH, still has a red squiggly underline, it might be an old word, but we still use the.

I don’t know why most of my dreams end in Europe, but they do. And I know a lot about the place so its not just drunk-schoolgirl jabber. Paris is unremarkable. I hate to burst the bubble but it smells like piss everywhere, although the French are much more cordial than their reputation would imply.

The gem of the continent for me has to be Amsterdam, argue all you want about it, but I’ve heard from multiple sources that Venice smells like piss too. Rome is all tourists from May-October, Barcelona is always a party, south France is too inaccessible. London’s great, just because it feels like NYC with royalty, and Big Ben (Amazing).

If you are planning a backpacking trip, or honeymoon, or anything where you would endure the ridiculous price tag to fly to Europe, and you don’t see Amsterdam you are wasting your money. De Wallen is a must, but on the walk there you will get to see some of the most beautiful downtown city architecture in the world.

A city of ~400k, the highrises are nowhere to be seen, but people going through the day-to-day are everywhere. Bike lovers, this is your city, having a car around would be a nuisance. It’s not a congested density, its a tolerable one. Not to mention you can walk a block in nearly any direction and see no fast food shops.

So my random blog of the night is an advertisement for Amsterdam, Netherlands.          The ‘I Amsterdam’ sign in the city is a classic photo as well, as that beer commercial points out. The Heineken factory is also a destination, though I have failed to reach it to this point. But I can firmly say, Amsterdam is not just for American college kids.

If anyone ever actually reads this, I’m a tall, extremely nice guy from the miserable mid-west who plays guitar, loves movies of every era, and comes from a small-town family that is very stately in their social gatherings. We also like to drink, heavily, for the desired effect, and I prefer a Heineken if you ever see me in a bar.

Terrible intro for some, yet I feel there might be some redeeming qualities for me. Like I said I’m tall, very not-dark, and handsome. Catholic school K-12…..what a sentence that is….although some counties have public schools that are much less preferable. I only say that because my parents are both teachers and they are saints.

I was inspired to write this blog by alot of things, drugs, (though not lately),’Californication’, Nathan Elias, The University of Toledo, Noel Gallagher,  and the fact that nobody seems to care. But seriously, the economy is horrible and 23 year old people everywhere are at least fucking pist.

I reference ‘Network’, 1976 I believe, because we need to get mad. I put a period at the end of that sentence because it was a serious thought. “We’ll tell you anything you want to hear, we lie like hell.” Mr. Beale was the man. And the….(recommend a non-partisan disparaging remark)….human beings in the media today kill all hope.

I really love to write, and it’s rare that I let people in. But America has become too uptight with it’s creativity. If you can do something great, show it off. As a tourist of the real world, seeing a musician in the subway is exhilarating, you get to see one layer of their existence, and if you decide not to tip them, congratulations. Do you work for JP?

I hope for the rest of my life that I’m just a transient visitor of the mid-west, though Columbus, Ohio is a pretty cool city. It has 2 great non-American sports teams, The Crew and the Blue Jackets, and the best College Football Program in the country. Columbus has what every mid-western city wants. People that are driven.

So as my first ever blog concludes, I hope you long for more, after all, the best bloggers in the world generate many dollars for the fathead investors of the world, and they keep the internet world goin. And if I haven’t made myself clear enough yet, I’m one of those liberal, musical, open-minded people that the mid-west can’t stand. Support us humans.